Friday, September 09, 2016

2016 Week 1 Picks

Welcome back, my damies! I've returned for yet another season of handicapping goodness, and I'm happy to see you've managed to meander back in my general digital direction. I'm taking the minimalist approach again, this season. Which basically means you won't have to scroll past too much whatnot in order to get to my picks...

But, as I'm sure you're already well aware, I have far too many hot takes to keep quiet for long. So I'm sure I'll have the flamethrower at the ready from time to time. And sooner much rather than later. And I'm always good for a tv and/or movie review or two (ie you should probably check out Atlanta). In fact, I've even updaTed the list I revealed around this time last year of my 100 Favorite Films! So, yeah. All that's on tap, too. So getcha p-corn ready....

But for now, I've just got my take on week 1. Which is basically me just going with my gut. A gut that's telling me that it's a good idea to fade the teams that everyone seems confident are going to win or lose. Like, say. Green Bay and Cleveland...

Actually, my gut is really telling me that you shouldn't be betting in week 1 at all. But I'm well aware that degens are gonna degen, so here I am to help you itch that monkey. After all, nobody likes an itchy monkey. Hence the popular aforementioned saying that definitely isn't a mixed metaphor that I'm desperately trying to force into common usage....

OK? OK. Now, without further dudes. Here are my week 1 picks! Good luck, pimps. And I'll catch you all the next time...

Week 1 Picks

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (+3) @ Atlanta Falcons

Minnesota Vikings (-1.5) @ Tennessee Titans

San Diego Chargers (+7) @ Kansas City Chiefs

Oakland Raiders (+1) @ New Orleans Saints

New York Jets (-2.5) vs Cincinnati Bengals

Cleveland Browns (+4) @ Philadelphia Eagles

Jacksonville Jaguars (+6) vs Green Bay Packers

Baltimore Ravens (-3) vs Buffalo Bills

Houston Texans (-6.5) vs Chicago Bears

Seattle Seahawks (-10.5) vs Miami Dolphins

Dallas Cowboys (pick) vs New York Giants

Indianapolis Colts (-4) vs Detroit Lions

Arizona Cardinals (-6) vs New England Patriots

Washington Tedskins (+3) vs Pittsburgh Steelers

San Francisco 49ers (+3) vs Los Angeles Rams

Last Season: 136-118-12 (.534)

ALL TIME: 1406-1017-83 (.577)

NCAA Top 25 Picks

(1) Alabama (-27) vs Western Kentucky

Troy (+36) @ (2) Clemson

(4) Ohio St. (-28.5) vs Tulsa

(5) Michigan (-35.5) vs UCF

Akron (+25.5) @ (10) Wisconsin

Syracuse (+14.5) vs (13) Louisville

(16) Iowa (-14.5) vs Iowa St.

(17) Tennessee (-11.5) vs Virginia Tech (Bristol, TN)

(18) Notre Dame (-28) vs Nevada

(24) Oregon (-24.5) vs Virginia

Last Season: 63-63-1 (.500)

ALL TIME: 747-524-30 (.586)



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