Thursday, December 24, 2015

Week 16 Picks: Poe! Poe! Poe! Merrrrrry Sheedmas!...

Merry merry, my damies! A very Merry Christmas and/or a happy holidays to you and yours. My gift to you? It's that video up there of Rasheed Wallace (and associates) singing Jingle Bells! So, yeah. You're welcome. Oh, and I even threw in a picture of Christmas Poe Dameron! So, yeah. Now you owe me. But we can discuss the ways in which you can repay me in 2016...

Enjoy the festivities, friends! And I'll catch you in the new year!...

Week 16 Picks
New York Jets (+3.5) vs New England Patriots + UNDER 46

Oakland Raiders (-5) vs San Diego Chargers

Washington Tedskins (+3.5) @ Philadelphia Eagles

Carolina Panthers (-7) @ Atlanta Falcons

Dallas Cowboys (+6) @ Buffalo Bills

Detroit Lions (-7.5) vs San Francisco 49ers

Houston Texans (-3.5) @ Tennessee Titans

Kansas City Chiefs (-11) vs Cleveland Browns

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (-3) vs Chicago Bears

Indianapolis Colts (+2.5) @ Miami Dolphins

Baltimore Ravens (+10.5) vs Pittsburgh Steelers

New Orleans Saints (-3) vs Jacksonville Jaguars

Arizona Cardinals (-4.5) vs Green Bay Packers

St. Louis Rams (+13.5) @ Seattle Seahawks

Minnesota Vikings (-4) vs New York Giants

Denver Broncos (-3.5) vs Cincinnati Bengals

Last Week: 9-4-2

Overall: 110-97-8 (.530)


Friday, December 18, 2015

Week 15 Picks: Wide Awake...

So I saw Star Wars: The Force Awakens, last night. Which is to say, I went to see Star Wars: The Force Awakens, last night. But the screening was delayed for 35 minutes due to some issue with the film's formatting. Then, to satisfy my alleged inconvenience, I was provided with 3(?!) free passes to a future film. And then I saw Star Wars: The Force Awakens. And you know what? It was pretty damn good...

I won't bother reviewing it here, as the abundance of spoilers/plot twists makes that effort a tad bit futile. That, and it's already been reviewed 6 ways from Sunday. But I will recommend that you go see it. It's true to the franchise, which is great. And for a science fiction/fantasy film especially, it has some stellar acting performances (Oscar Isaac, Daisy Ridley, and John Boyega, mostly. Though the holdovers more than hold their own). It's definitely the most I've ever laughed during a Star Wars movie, too. Which is always a bonus. Especially for a film like Star Wars, where you're gonna get a more active and involved viewing audience than at your typical screening. Something about everyone excitedly laughing in unison. Makes for a good time...

So instead of watching the sloppy, listless, and poorly officiaTed football this weekend, go see Star Wars: The Force Awakens. You should bet on those sloppy, listless and poorly officaTEd games before you do, by utilizing the advice below. But if you're going to watch anything, I advise it be Star Wars. OR anything else that's not the game involving your home team, really. But especially Star Wars...or Fargo, if you can't bring yourself to get off the couch. Wow, what a finale. But that's a different story for a different day...

Good luck, my damies. And may the force be with you...and not your bookie. Which rhymes with wookie. Because Star Wars...

Week 15 Picks
New England Patriots (-14) vs Tennessee Titans

New York Jets (-3) @ Dallas Cowboys

Minnesota Vikings (-5.5) vs Chicago Bears

New York Giants (+5) vs Carolina Panthers

Washington Tedskins (+1) vs Buffalo Bills

Jacksonville Jaguars (-3) vs Atlanta Falcons

Kansas City Chiefs (-7) @ Baltimore Ravens

Houston Texans (+2.5) @ Indianapolis Colts

Oakland Raiders (+4.5) vs Green Bay Packers

Seattle Seahawks (-14.5) vs Cleveland Browns

Denver Broncos (+7) @ Pittsburgh Steelers

San Diego Chargers (-1) vs Miami Dolphins

San Francisco 49ers (+7.5) vs Cincinnati Bengals

Arizona Cardinals (-3) @ Philadelphia Eagles

New Orleans Saints (-2.5) vs Detroit Lions

Last Week: 10-6-0

Overall: 101-93-6 (.520)


Friday, December 11, 2015

Week 14 Picks: Lo And Behold...

Greetings, my damies! No scorching hot takes this week, I'm afraid. Just picks...and a picture from the latest Lindsay Lohan photoshoot. Because, no. She's not dead...yet. And neither am I! With this week's picks helpfully serving as proof...

Good luck, Teds. And I'll catch you next time...

Week 14 Picks
New England Patriots (-3.5) @ Houston Texans

Pittsburgh Steelers (+3) @ Cincinnati Bengals

San Francisco 49ers (+1.5) @ Cleveland Browns

Chicago Bears (-3.5) vs Washington Tedskins

Kansas City Chiefs (-10) vs San Diego Chargers

Detroit Lions (-2.5) @ St. Louis Rams

New York Jets (-7) vs Tennessee Titans

Philadelphia Eagles (+1.5) vs Buffalo Bills

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (-3.5) vs New Orleans Saints

Jacksonville Jaguars (pick) vs Indianapolis Colts

Seattle Seahawks (-9.5) @ Baltimore Ravens

Carolina Panthers (-8.5) vs Atlanta Falcons

Denver Broncos (-7.5) vs Oakland Raiders

Green Bay Packers (-7) vs Dallas Cowboys

Miami Dolphins (+2.5) vs New York Giants

Last Week: 7-10-0

Overall: 91-87-6 (.511)


Friday, December 04, 2015

Week 13 Picks: My Two Daves...

Ladies and gentleman, I have thoughts and comments regarding the Red Sox and their acquisition of David Price. Actually, it's more of a question. And that question is this:

Is it racist for me to want to wish David Price luck by saying "Godspeed, you black emperor!"? Give that a think while you're mulling over this week's picks, and get back to me. OR don't, and I'll just assume it's the jump off and start designing the t-shirts. So don't...

No, but seriously. Congratulations to Dave Dombrowski for outbidding all other suitors by $30 million in order to convince a guy that doesn't want to play in Boston, to play in Boston. I'm sure David Price will adjust masterfully, pitch very well in the postseason, and not at all become the CC Sabathia of the Back Bay. BB Sabathia, if you will. Which you shouldn't...

Yes, Price has a great regular season track record. And yes, it's never a "bad deal" when you didn't have to give up any prospects (it's not my money, guy kid). But you'll have to excuse me for not celebrating the impending arrival of a guy who:

A) has shown at every turn that he probably won't adapt well to this market
B) is ONLY coming here for the money
C) is on the WRONG side of 30 (paging John Henry)
D) is best known for gas-canning it up come playoff time (career ERA of 5.12 over 63 IP. 6.17 ERA in 2015)

I guess it's a good sign that the ownership group is actually letting Dombrowksi do his thing (or at least do this thing). So there's always that. And I like that he aggressively pursued who he wanted. So there's always that, too. I just think that there's every indication that this particular player may not be a perfect fit for this particular situation. And a $30+ mil a year player should fit like a glove. Whereas this has all the earmarks of a square peg being forced into a round hole...

Hey, I hope I'm wrong. I hope Price is great, and doesn't let the media (or David Ortiz) knock him off his game. I hope the front office is able to manage the opt-out after year 3 effectively (no chance in Hell), and it serves as a carrot instead of an anchor. And I hope that this is only the latest in a line of successful Dave Dombrowski deals that I don't like or understand. I don't think that it will, and I'm fairly confident that they won't (paging BB Sabathia). But I've enjoyed being wrong before, and I'm not averse to trying it again...

And I know I sound like a spoiled killjoy (Old Rick!!!!), picking nits with my scorching hot take. But rest assured, I'm not one of those Teds that will root against a guy on my own team just because I didn't like the circumstances from whence he came. I mean, this isn't JD Drew we're talking about. I just don't like the deal, for the reasons I've laid out. And I do like colorfully going on the record. So here we are...

I wish Dombrowksi and Price the best of luck, though. As we enter an era that I'm tentatively calling 'The Dawn of the Daves'. And here's to hoping they won't RUIN MY SUMMAH!!!...    

Now I'll wish you some good luck before bestowing on you this week's prophetic picks. So Ted speed, you (probably) white emperors! And I'll catch you next week...  

Week 13 Picks

New England Patriots (-10) vs Philadelphia Eagles

Houston Texans (+3) @ Buffalo Bills

Chicago Bears (-6.5) vs San Francisco 49ers

Cincinnati Bengals (-7) @ Cleveland Browns

Jacksonville Jaguars (+3.5) @ Tennessee Titans

St. Louis Rams (+6.5) vs Arizona Cardinals

Baltimore Ravens (+4.5) @ Miami Dolphins

Minnesota Vikings (pick) vs Seattle Seahawks

New York Giants (+3.5) vs New York Jets

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (-1) vs Atlanta Falcons

Oakland Raiders (+3.5) vs Kansas City Chiefs

Denver Broncos (-4) vs San Diego Chargers

Carolina Panthers (-7) @ New Orleans Saints

Indianapolis Colts (+10) @ Pittsburgh Steelers + UNDER 49

Washington Tedskins (-4.5) vs Dallas Cowboys + OVER 42

Thanksgiving: 2-4-0

Overall: 84-77-6 (.521)

NCAA Top 25 Picks

(1) Clemson (-5) vs (8) North Carolina

(2) Alabama (-17) vs (18) Florida

(4) Iowa (+3.5) vs (5) Michigan St.

(24) USC (+4.5) vs (7) Stanford

(12) Baylor (-20.5) vs Texas

(17) Houston (-6.5) vs (20) Temple

Overall: 60-60-1 (.500)