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Wednesday, September 04, 2013

But Wait, There's More!


I spoke to a screenwriter, this weekend, at my sister's fantastic Indian wedding (this was before Ron Popeil cut me off on the Long Island Expressway). And we came to a startling quick consensus that Breaking Bad is probably the most annoyingly over analyzed show in the history of television. And not only that, but we also agreed that we thought the writers had bought into all of the over analysis, and that it had started effecting the way they were crafting their episodes. You know, overloading them with potential foreshadowing and insisting that every episode come equipped with a cliffhanger ending. Not that cliffhangers aren't great, but any trick that's used every single time will more often than not begin to become stale and predictable. Much like it's begin to happen here...
OMG WALT SHAVED HIS HEAD!
THAT MEANS FANBOY FANBOY
BEST SHOW EVAAAAAHH!

Now, whether any of that's true or not, that positive reinforcement from a  (combined with what I've felt have been a few lackluster episodes) has encouraged me to abandoned my recent attempts at a weekly review, in hopes of being able to salvage any enjoyment I could possibly get from the final 4 episodes. At the very leas I've got Boardwalk Empire to look forward to, as that series reboots with season four this Sunday after football. A show my new friend and I agreed provides all the entertainment value of Breaking Bad, without a good chunk of the inherent pretentiousness. We also agreed that we preferred the acting of Steve Buscemi, Jack Huston & Stephen Graham (not to mention Jeffrey Wright) to that of Bryan Cranston, Aaron Paul and Dean Norris, and discussed our mutual love for everything Marcia Gay Harden that doesn't include Aaron Sorkin (because Sorkin can't write for female characters, obv). But I'll just stop my gushing now before either any of you (or this dude's wife) get the wrong impression. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Except for, you know. The potential for intellectual adultery...

Oh, and as for the legendary pitchman that almost ran me off the road in his Mercedes as I attempted to maneuver my way on the LIE (his 'RONCO' vanity plates gave him away)? I'm willing to let bygones be bygones. OR, to use the parlance of that rat bastard's times. I'd be more than happy to "set it and forget it". You know, as long as he sends me a complimentary pocket fisherman. Besides, Ron's nearly ending my life doesn't even register as relevant in a weekend that saw (A) my burning of rice puffs and clarified butter at the behest of some sort of priest setting off the fire alarm in the middle of my sister's ceremony, and (B) my getting changed in the same tuxedo shop that saw this go down back when Ben Stiller was still considered funny...

Yeah, I'd say if I had to comment on the enjoyment and entertainment of this weekend I'd definitely classify it as "strong to very strong"...


As for the rest of the myriad of sports and entertainment scene that I often offer commentary, I don't have too much to report. The Red Sox continue to cruise along, with last night being arguably their most satisfying win of the season. Between Lester, Middlebrooks, the bullpen and the fact they were up against Scherzer (19-2) and Detroit. And Kate Upton was named model of the year. Mostly because she's a beautiful woman and one of the few models who weighs more than 100 pounds and doesn't look like she was just kicked off the H-train. But mostly because virtually everything she does can be turned into a GIF that prominently features her fun bags. And that's going to win you a lot of awards and make you a lot of money more often than not. This is America, after all. And if you don't like big breasted blondes doing provocative things, then you can get the fuck out...

But, hey. Before you do. Don't forget that you're going to want to come back on Friday, red blooded American or not. I'll have the first installment of my 2013 NFL & NCAA picks (if you want the pick for Thursday. head to Twitter). I'll say again that I'm long overdue for variance to rear it's ugly head, but that's not gonna stop me from attempting to continue defying the odds while basically not profiting at all...

It's all good, though. I live to serve, after all. And by that, I mean I'm almost never happy in these situations unless I'm miserable. And there isn't anything quite as agonizing as being convinced that the only reason you're beating the book is because you don't actually have any money on the line. But, such is my life. And I'll continue to offer up my tortured soul as entertainment for the masses...

NFL Picks

Last Season: 171-120-9 (.585)

Overall: 951-606-56 (.607)

NCAA Top 25 Picks

Last Season: 90-56-3 (.614)

Overall: 544-340-22 (.613)


Gaudy numbers, huh? Yep. And those results put me in an elite class of Interweb handicapper, too. But there's no reason that should help drive traffic to my site. Not like there's a large chunk of the populous out there that likes to win money betting on football, or anything...

So, yeah. Friday, friends. I'll see you then. And don't worry. I'll make sure my picks don't come with an abundance of over analysis...

#BAGSMUNMAN

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