Thursday, June 09, 2011

The Rise of Papi Face Tomato Nose...

Chucky loved the B's, kid. Had a WICKED old school B's coat!
Hot enough for ya?  Ha!  I just had to say it.  Just like I have to comment on the fact that it's great weather for hockey, too, isn't it?  Yeah, don't worry.  I've gotten all the NHL and Bruin PinkHat hate out of my system, and I'm ready to get on with my Summer...

Big deal.  So they're extended playoff run is ruining my sports talk radio experience and causing me to lose some respect for a lot of broadcasters I've admired.  So what?  There's no way I'm letting that get me down.  I've said my piece, so now I'll move on and leave the negativity behind.  Which is to say I'll just channel that negativity towards people (Bill Simmons) and issues that actually deserve my time and effort.  I can't just give up on negativity, now.  After all, I didn't get in the position to sponsor a softball team because I was some PinkHat that straddles the fence.  No way!  That's just not what I do.  However, I'm also not in the business of beating dead horses.  Betting on them, maybe (::cough:: Eight Belles ::cough::), but not beating them...

Hey, maybe the Bruins will win (knowing my luck), maybe they'll lose.  Either way, the only real long term effect is that ticket prices will go up. And since there's a salary cap, and they don't need a new building, that means the owner's will reap virtually all the benefits, and the team will fade back into obscurity until they make another run in another 15 years or so.  That is, if they're league doesn't fold up shop by then.  So go ahead, win the Stanley Cup, just don't think it's going to make the slightest positive difference .  Not Nationally, and certainly not in the PinkHat Hub of the Northeast where they'll probably be head over heels in love with the New England Revolution by then.  Matter of fact, the end game to all of this is really quite negative after you've purchased all your championship gear.  Just ask legendary Boston sports figure, Will Hunting, what he thinks will happen if the Bruins take home the Stanley Cup:
She's "Children of the Corn" scary...

 'Maybe I'll just rob my buddy of his hard earned money, fill his favorite sports arena with a bunch of tourists and kids, and make it so he can never again get a ticket to see his favorite team without mortgaging his home and selling one of his kidneys.  So what do I think? Yeah, I'm holding out for something better"...

But yeah, I'm not sweatin' it.  They win, they lose, whatever.  I already know what's comin'.  Chucky gets a new coat, and everyone moves on to the next big thing in the 15 second sports loyalty cycle that exists around here.  Besides,  I've got bigger fish to fry, or steaks to grill, as the case may be, and it's time I get down to throwin' those delicious virtual slabs of bovine onto the flame.  I got some great notes on the Sox, a movie review of sorts, some social networking etiquette, and I'll tell you why I'd rather spend an eternity in Hell than even a single minute in "Grantland".  It's Rooch Nation, friends, and if you're really looking for a bandwagon to jump on, then by all means, jump on mine.  Just don't expect to be able to buy a pink colored hat to show your support...

Read on, fine citizens.  And enjoy...

Big Papi Face Tomato Nose?
Red Sox Update
Last Week: 5-0
Standings: 35-26, 1st place in AL East by 1 game over NYY

Here are some notes from the week that was in Boston Red Sox baseball:

"The Commish"
*Imagine my pleasant surprise when I actually dared to turn on sports radio this week, and was unexpectedly greeted with these gems from the one and only, Mr. Peter Gammons.  They're paraphrased slightly, because I didn't have my tape recorder or personal sexy stenographer handy, but they're pretty damn close...

"Kevin Towers (former Padres GM) always told me that Adrian Gonzalez was like the Greg Maddux of hitting."


"The NHL still isn't respected nationally.  People see that one player bites another and doesn't get suspended? It's just tough to respect that."          

OK, maybe I just included the 2nd quote because I'm truly not "over" the NHL dominating the local sports spotlight, but it was still refreshing to hear someone of Peter's stature take a backhanded slap at the sport while at the same time giving the Bruins his best.  Just a class act all the way, that Peter Gammons.  Not like me.  I would have said I had money against the Bruins and then set up the hosts with a line like, "I heard one of the other hosts on your station earlier today that was an ex hockey player or ex hockey coach, I just can't remember his name...".  Guess that's the difference between a Hall of Famer and a dude that's still living in his parents house.  Well, at least a key difference...

As for the quote about Adrian Gonzalez, Gonzo being a hitting "nerd" akin to Greg Maddux is having a great side effect that I don't think any of us really saw coming.  He's rubbed off on David Ortiz, or as I have now dubbed him, courtesy of Family Guy, "Papi Face Tomato Nose".  Not to say he's completely responsible for the monstrous year Papi is having (.323/15/34), but by all accounts, including Peter's, what Adrian has done is given David a similar hitter to talk to about...well, about hitting!  Gammons said it's made a big difference in the way Papi has prepared for both games and individual at bats, and it's plain to see that it's paying dividends.  Adrian Gonzalez, man.  Is there anything this guy can't do?  Dude's just a special player, and I'm glad he's going to be on my team for years to come.  Teacher. Brother. Dangerous Slugger...

*On the opposite end of the spectrum, it looks like  the Sox could be without the services of Dustin Pedroia for a while after he got re-aggravated a right knee injury last night and was sent back to Boston for further evaluation.  The early word is that he'll probably miss a month.  Obviously this isn't "good news", but considering Petey is batting .247 with a lowly .338 on base percentage, it's not the worst news, either.  Let's give this guy some time to rest, time to recover, and get him back out there healthy and ready to go.  Besides, I'm willing to believe that if a career .299 hitter was hitting .247 for 2+ months, then they were probably injured, anyway.  So let's get him healthy, get him back on the field, and get him raking to the point where he can really help make this lineup the offensive powerhouse that it was said to be before the season...

*Then, we have the pitching, and all anyone seems to want to talk about, is "What's wrong with Jon Lester?"  To me, it's become rather evident other his past few starts.  He's overthrowing.  Now that doesn't mean it's easy to fix, just because I can diagnose him from afar, but at least I'm pretty sure that it's not the result of any lingering injury, or a sign that he's somehow lost his way.  I have faith he'll pitch his way through this tough stretch, and you should too.  Our only concern should be whether or not Buchholz and Beckett are still on top of their game when Jonny Boy eventually settles down.  Then again, the Red Sox are winning all of Lester's starts, anyway, so I guess we'll only really need him to be on his game come playoff time.  Not that I'm tryin' to wait that long, but still...

*Oh and as for Papi's "bat flip" the other night, and the back and forth between Ortiz and Girardi that's ensued? That one's easy.  If you want to keep them from showing you up, then don't let them hit it out of the park.  Easy game...  

This Week: @NYY, @TOR, @TB

It's a confusing thing, that Interweb...

There's a Social Networking Site for That...

Far be it for me to tell you how to use your social networking services, but as someone whole utilizes virtually every avenue out there, allow me to give you a free piece of advice.  IF you insist on doing play by play of LIVE sporting events over social networking, don't use Facebook, use Twitter.  It's bad enough that Facebook has become the de facto site for everyone's dog and baby pictures, there's no need to muddy it up with a running dialogue of an event that everyone else is already watching on TV.  And I'm not saying you can't comment about these things on Facebook before, during and after the fact, just don't act like the freakin' news ticker.  If you want to do that, that's cool, just take it to Twitter.  Twitter is the NOW, and your comments will be met with open arms, and just as quickly dismissed by the timeline.  Just like the play by play of an actual game.  When I want to know what's happening in a game I can't see, I always go to Twitter first, then to a scoreboard of some kind.  I NEVER go to Facebook, and I'm pretty sure nobody else does, either.  Why?  Because it's just not the right outlet for that kind of thinking.  Dog pictures, yes, but not a running commentary on something that you SHOULD be paying attention to on TV...

Again, maybe this is just another selfish attempt by yours truly to try and cater the world to my liking, but per usual, I'm deluded into thinking I'm doing you all a public service.  I mean, if you are one of the people that does this, then I'm sure most of your friends already have you blocked on their news feed.  Hopefully, this can serve as a wakeup call and get you back in their good graces.  For the rest of you, well, hopefully this can be a start towards cleaning up your news feed.  I can't do anything about the dog pictures, though.  At least not yet...

Just doing my part, trying to make the world of social media a better place for all of us.  Don't hate...

Welcome to Grantland.  Now turn around and leave...

You know what doesn't bother me in the least?  Watching people that I don't like achieve great things and receive noteworthy accolades.  Honestly, it doesn't bother me at all.  People work hard, they get rewarded.  It's simple as that.  I don't like them?  SO what, that doesn't take away from the fact that they're talented and ambitious.  You know what I don't like?  When people achieve, whether I like them or not, and for the life of me, I can't understand how or why it happened.  That's where I continue to find myself when it comes to Boston's own "Sports Guy", Bill Simmons, and his latest ESPN backed project, Grantland...

For me, it's like Glen Rivers MD all over again.  A guy who was brought in because he was supposed to be good at molding youngsters, yet now is heralded as a genius when it comes to dealing with veterans, simply because he won a title with a stacked roster.  A change in perception based purely on results.  Simmons, the "Sports Guy", who was supposed to represent the average Joe of a Boston sports fan, is now serving as a "mentor" to a site that's more or less positioning itself as the upper crust of  ESPN for nerds, if you will.  At least sports nerds that actually like reading lengthy articles.  Again, a change in perception, and in this case a change in job title, based purely on results, or in this case, page hits and podcast downloads...

I get paid to do this???
But OK, so what.  Maybe I don't understand how Simmons can be popular when I know for a fact there's no way his average reader gets more than 40% of the way through one of his typical posts.  Fine.  That's my problem.  But where I really run into an issue, is when ESPN gives him this new power within a month of the release of a book in which he rips the top talent at the network and suggests what he would do if he left ESPN today.  Riiiiight, yeah that's totally how things should work.  Rip your employer, belittle your coworkers, and immediately receive a raise and more power.  I think I'll try that when I go into work today, see how it goes.  I bet at the very least it will allow me more time to blog!  Then again, what type of journalistic integrity should I expect from a website that's regularly started using the word "banned" to describe suspensions.  Banned, huh?  So then what are Pete Rose & HGH, exactly?  Expelled?  Come on now...

Sure, some of me is jealous of Bill's success, it'd be naive of me not to admit that, but that still doesn't mean I'm wrong when I say he's almost all "character" and virtually no substance.  Maybe that's why he felt he needed a stable of talented writers (whom I've never heard of by the way), to make up for his shortcomings, I don't know.  What I do know, is that I won't be reading Grantland.  All that will do is continue to further the myth that Bill Simmons is talented, and that he speaks for the average Boston fan.  Two viewpoints that I don't think anyone would share if they actually listened to what this guy had to say...

Grantland: Where a "superfan" turned mentor takes his shot at legitimate journalism.  Yeah, no thanks.  I'd rather watch the Bruins...

Looks like Morpheus found another Neo. Why are they always skinny white boys?
Searching For Bobby Fischer's Sanity...

So I watched the HBO documentary on former chess wizard, Bobby Fischer, this week, and here's what I got for ya:

*The movie, Searching for Bobby Fischer, is better than the documentary about the actual dude.  It was good, but I kept waiting for Larry Fishburne to show up and yell "there it is!", and it was mighty disappointing when that never happened...          

Yeah, totally normal dude...
*Bobby Fischer, the man, was a straight up nut bar.  Started playing chess at 6, was a master by age 7, and pretty much did nothing but play chess for the next 30 years of his life.  Actually, he took time out when he was 16 to kick his mom out of the house (right?) but other than that, it was pretty much chess and only chess 24/7...

*He was Jewish, but at the same time, he was a rabid anti-Semite.  Totally normal, right?  They even played the tapes of when he called in to foreign radio shows around 9/11 and was basically giddy in saying that the Americans and the Jews were getting exactly what they deserved.  Whoa!  Easy there, pawn star...

All in all, I pretty much just told you everything you need to know, so I wouldn't bother watching the documentary.  Bobby Fischer was crazy, and he was crazy good at chess. Now he's dead.  The end...

Now before I sign off, I'd like to give a shout out to Team, who after a double header sweep last night, have now pushed their impressive mark to 9-2.  Not bad, fellas.  Not too bad at all.  And seeing as I've finally been provided with some documentation to prove that the team actually exists, here you go...

Softball pimps...

Quite the motley crew, aren't they?  Well keep on keepin' on, fellas.  You're doin' me proud...

To the rest of you, have a great rest of your week, a great weekend, and I'll catch you on the flipman...

Teddy Williams...



Ted said...

When are you going to start making Rooch Nation do rags?

Brett Ferruccio said...

Whoa. Do rags? I don't think I've heard anyone use that term since 1996. I'll look into it though, for ya, Ted Pac Shakur. Give my best to Kriss Kross & Stevie Van Zandt...

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