Pages

Friday, December 12, 2008

NFL Week 15 Picks

Greetings and salutations boys and girls. I got some good stuff to get to this week, so I'm just gonna get right down to it...

First up, let's head to Vegas for a little news on the goings on at the Major League Baseball Winter Meetings...


Hot Stove

New building. "New" owners. Same ole Yankees...

CC Sabathia, Mike Cameron, AJ Burnett and God knows who else seem destined to be wearing pin stripes before the off season is through, and from the sounds of it, Brian Cashman and the Steinbrenners might be just getting started. Think they're pissed about missing the playoffs? Yeah, I'd tend to agree...

So will all this free wheeling bring the Yankees to the promise land in '09? Well, I don't see why not, but then again these are games that will actually have to be played. Take this scenario, for instance. Say the Yankees cruise to the AL East title and a 1st round match up with the Angels...and then Sabathia loses game 1...and then the Bronx is burining...that's right, again...

And blah, blah I'm sure you can go on and on about how "well that's why we have Burnett and Wang waiting in the wings", but I'm just not buying it. Truth is, as good as Sabathia has looked, as good as Burnett has looked, neither has proven a GD thing when it comes to winning big games, in the playoffs, and for a contender. When I see it, I'll believe it. But until then, the Yankees will only be viewed as a threat in my eyes when it comes to games in the regular season. I'm not even saying it's the Red Sox that will necessarily bring them down, I'm just saying it looks to me like they could be setting themselves up for the ultimate tease, and a huge disappointment. And that's if they actually sign these guys, and they all somehow manage to stay healthy...

Carl Pavano, anyone? Paging Carl freaking Pavano...oh, you just saw him?...and he was picking up his last paycheck with a mask and a gun?...

Get some, New York. Spending big is only good when the money's going towards the right guy for your team. Mark Teixeira, baby. He's the 1-bagger you wanted, and he's headed to the Hub...allegedly...

Stay tuned for more on that...


Get ready for whats sure to be the greatest Hall of Fame acceptance speech of all time. Ricky Henderson's favorite player, Ricky Henderson, is on the ballot for the first time this year, and is a shoe in to be part of the Cooperstown class of 2009. Hell even the nation of reclusive nerds that are the Baseball Writer's Association can't screw this one up. Take a peek at Rick's resume...

*All Time leader in runs scored (2,295)

*All Time leader in stolen bases (1,406); his 130 in '82 is still the single season mark

*2nd All Time in walks (2,190)

*10-time All Star

*1990 AL MVP (6 times finished top 10 in voting)

*2-time World Series Champ (OAK '89 + TOR '93)

*Played for 9 different MLB teams over 25 seasons (OAK, NYY, NYM, BOS, ANA, LAD, SFG, SEA)


The list goes on, but pretty much that's the long and short of his statistical greatness. I could go on and on about how he used his power to revolutionize the lead off position, or how he played with a flair reminiscent of Apollo Creed and Willi Mays Hayes, but I'm just gonna sit back and wait for Ricky to do the talking. Along with being one of the games greatest ever, he's also done more than his part to be labeled as one of the games all time sound bytes. He's the guy the reporters make a bee line to when something's just gone down, or Hell, even when everything's kosher!

He's one of the best the game has ever produced, and at his speech, it's gonna be great to here his version of his crazy and wild ride through the last quarter century of baseball...

On that day...he will be the greatest...of All Time...thank you...

Now, drum roll please. It's on to the picks! Not yet "award winning", maybe. But still better than all the "professional handicappers" that can be heard moaning about this year's terrible luck all the way from the Vegas Strip. Well cry me a river, boys. This kid has the magic touch, and for once, he's usin' it somewhere other than the king sized bed. Ooooooooo...

Sorry. Get some!...

Week 15 Picks
New England Patriots (-6.5) @ Oakland Raiders

OK, this is where things start to get a little dicey...

Matt Cassel's father passed away this week, and for that I send him my thoughts and prayers. It has to be immensely difficult for him to deal with that in the middle of an NFL season, but from a betting standpoint what exactly does it mean?

Well for me it means one of two things...

1) He plays. He plays with passion. He has one of the best games he's had all season...

2) He doesn't play. The Pats make the Raiders look like the second coming of Montana's 49ers. The Pats lose, and the season's effectively over...

I'm goin' with 1.

Brett Favre ain't got nothin on this mourning performance...



New York Jets (-7.5) vs Buffalo Bills

It's like this. When I drafted my fantasy team, I decided to take a 6th round gamble and put a majority of my eggs in the Brett Faver/Jericho Cotchery basket. Well, if my fantasy squad has any shot in Hell of advancing to my second straight championship, Favre is gonna have to show up for first time in what seems like 2-3 months. Cotchery? Well he's on my bench. And a few TDs his way could leave me kicking myself. But just to be clear, the only reason I'm picking the Jets to cover is for my own selfish financial gain. Just sayin'. So buyer beware...


Atlanta Falcons (-3) vs Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Just a reminder. When playing each other, NFC South teams are 10-0 at home. That trend served me well last week when both Carolina and New Orleans covered, and I expect the Falcons to help the adage hold true...


Carolina Panthers vs Denver Broncos OVER 47

Jacksonville Jaguars vs Green Bay Packers OVER 44

Hey what can I say? I'm a sucker for a good OVER/UNDER. In these two games, I see 3 good offenses (not JAX), and basically NO good defenses. OH, and did I mention I have Eddie Royal, DeAngelo Williams and Maurice Jones-Drew going this week in fantasy?

Yeah, you were right. It is all about me. And I wouldn't have it any other way...


Indianapolis Colts (-16) vs Detroit Lions

INSERT MATT MILLEN JOKE HERE.


Kansas City Chiefs (+5.5) vs San Diego Chargers

Much like a spirited game of garage ping pong, the NFL is all about match ups. And if Herm and his band of misfits could manage just a one point loss to the Chargers in week 10 @ San Diego, then I have to like their chances as nearly a touchdown dog at the friendly confines of Arrowhead Stadium. Then again, I did have a female friend in college who was a Chiefs fan, went to many Chiefs games, and still thought the team actually played their home games in the state of Kansas. So maybe that home field advantage isn't all it's cracked up to be...

(Hey, at least she wasn't the girl that had just graduated from the Newhouse School of Communications that thought the "second" hand on a clock meant that the hand was the "second" biggest...Ahhh college degrees. Sometimes a piece of paper is exactly that...)


Miami Dolphins (-6) vs San Fransisco 49ers

Get ready to look smart. After they beat the Jets, everybody is gonna be eager as a roofie slanger at a frat house (not mine) to pick the Niners as this week's trendy upset. Well not so fast my friend. For starters, virtually NO team has won this year when traveling from West to East. And for finishers, Miami has given up just 15 points in their last 2 games, both road wins...

Good enough for me! AKA - Should be waaay more than good enough for you...


Baltimore Ravens (-1.5) vs Pittsburgh Steelers

In week 4, a still fresh faced Joe Flacco took Big Ben and friends to the brink in a 23-20 overtime loss at Heinz field. This time? The venue has shifted to M&T Bank Stadium, Flacco is more experienced, and the Ravens are the ones that come in with the more ferocious defense. As good as the Steelers are, the one thing they continue to struggle with are exotic blitz packages. Strange, seeing as that's what they constantly throw at their opponents, but hey that's the way it is...

Obviously this should be a knock down, drag out, physical war in the trenches, but I like the Ravens to make just a few more plays and come out on top by a FG or so. Bad news for the Patriots playoff hopes, but good news for you if you pick the Ravens and win. And like I always say. When the Patriots start paying me, I'll start caring about their results more than the ones where I have my money...


And then there's Maude!...


Washington Redskins (-7) @ Cincinnati Bengals

St. Louis Rams (+3.5) vs Seattle Seahawks

New York Jets (-7) vs Buffalo Bills

Tennessee Titans (-2) @ Houston Texans

Arizona Cardinals (-2.5) vs Minnesota Vikings

New York Giants (+3) @ Dallas Cowboys

Cleveland Browns (+14) @ Philadelphia Eagles (Monday Night)



Last Week: 11-3-2 (Top Picks: 6-1-2)

Overall: 116-70-7 (.619)

Top Picks: 62-33-5 (.645)

My top picks bring all the loots to the yard. Damn right, they're bettor than yours...

And no, I can't teach you...


NCAA Top 25 Picks
I'll be back with my bowl picks, but last week's 6-1 was a great way to wrap up the college football regular season. In a year where the experts seemed to be constantly baffled by each week's result, I was here to help guide you through the choppy waters, and hopefully was able to lead you back to port with a few extra clams in your pocket...


Last Week: 6-1-0

2008 Season: 140-83-7 (.624)


Hesiman Trophy
There are 3 things you should know about this year's Heisman Trophy...

1) The voters got the finalists right. Tim Tebow, Colt McCoy and Sam Bradford were far and the best healthy skill players during the '08 season, and thus deserve a shot at the trophy. I say "skill" because defenders and lineman are never given any consideration, and I say "healthy", because the real winner should be dinged up Texas Tech redshirt Sophomore WR, Michael Crabtree. Those of you thinking Crabtrees's running mate, Tech QB Graham Harrell, should be here too? Well, he's not better than the 3 signal callers above, and he wouldn't even be in the conversation without having Crabtree at his disposal. It's simple math. Without Crabtree's catch and run against Texas, Harrell's just another "very good" Big XII QB. That should say it all about his candidacy...


2) Tim Tebow should win it, but he won't. And his chick should be given the part of Beth Chapman in "Dog the Bounty Hunter: The Musical", but she won't get that either. He's the best skill player in the country not named Crabtree, but the way he goes about his business, and the fact that he won it last year as a Sophomore, will be the two most popular, yet disgustingly biased, reasons why he doesn't finish #1. Unlike any of the other finalists, Tebow had to play all year with the Heisman target on his back, and he still put up numbers worthy of strong consideration. And I don't wanna hear about how he doesn't have the same "pro-ready" skill set of a guy like Bradford. This award has nothing to do with the NFL, the NFL Draft, or who has the most "well rounded" game. It's about who is the best player in college football. That player, is still Michael Crabtree. But seeing as he's hurt, that player is clearly Tim Tebow. Yeah, clearly. Which is why this result should be another in a long line that will only serve to reinforce my distrust in the voters, and disgust in the voting process...


3) Sam Bradford will win it, but he shouldn't. Bradford's a great player, don't get me wrong, and his numbers are more than deserving of a Heisman winner. However, he's simply not the best player in the country. I don't know a more direct way to put it. I probably watched this kid play 4-6 times this year (which is probably 3-5 times more than most of the voters), and there was just nothing about him that stood out to me. Nothing to make me sit back and say "wow, that kid is the man!". He's good, no doubt. But it's his team and his conference that are going to push him over the top. People see the Big XII, and they figure whoever comes out on top has to have the Heisman winner on it. If Tech were in the title game, it would be Graham Harrell. It it were Texas, it would be McCoy. But it's Oklahoma, so Bradford gets the nod. It may not be "right", but wince when has mens college football ever been about getting things right?...


So there you have it. My vote would go for Tebow, but expect a Bradford, Tebow, McCoy finish...

There's two ways to go about making a cool commercial...

The right way...




and the WRONG way...




You have Phelps and A-Fraud trying to act cool, when we all know they're both Teds. You have Tony Hawk for some random reason. And you have Kobe Bryant, wearin' that "this thing better move me into the 'non-threatening towards white people' demographic again, or I'm gonna fire my agent" look on his face. And are we for a second supposed to believe they were all together when they filmed this thing? Ha! Yeah and Paula Abdul was able to find the world's first talking cat for her 'Opposites Attract' video. This thing makes that freakin' video look like a Blue Ray remake of the Matrix Reloaded. What a bunch of money grubbin' frauds...


Fantasy Update
Well the semifinals have already begun, thanks to the NFL Network's Thursday Night Football, and it's already looking like the beginning of the end for yours truly. First, here's my score after last night's game...

IN LIKE FLYNN 5 $2.00 Kicker 8

The good news is, I actually managed to score 5 points. For most of the game it looked as if I'd be doomed with 1 or 2, but a late rally pulled me into some realm of respectability. The bad news, and oh there's lots of it, starts with the fact that the Bears biggest offensive weapon last night, Devin Hester, was robbed of at least 1 touchdown and over 100 yards receiving thanks to the Swiss chess Saints secondary and their knack for defensive pass interference. Not only is Hester on my team, but one of his 65 yard PI penalties help set up a rushing touchdown for running back Matt Forte, whom coincidentally enough, I am playing against...

That brings me the running backs. I had Reggie Bush starting, and Ian, my buddy, had Matt Forte. Matter of fact, Forte was the only one he had going while I trotted out Hester, Bush, and tight end Jeremy Shockey. SO. Bush, who had been injured for most of the last month, was finally healthy and ready to give me that extra push I needed here in the playoffs. Now I knew he wouldn't fair too well against the stingy Bears D, so when he put up only 30 yards rushing and 16 yards receiving, I wasn't all that surprised. IT was the fact that he got dinged up, and the actual way Matt Forte went about scoring his points, that let me know that this week, it appears my fantasy good will for the year 2008 is going to start to run dry...

I mean come one. Dude get's injured on the 1st play from scrimmage, has to be taken to the locker room and still manages to single handedly outscore the 3 guys I had goin? And sure, maybe they're not my 3 key guys, but on a team that's thrived on balance all year long, it's not a good start...

I think the Beastie Boys said it best when they said "If it's gonna be that kind of party, I'm gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes!". Not a bad idea, my friends. Not lookin' like a bad idea at all...

Pray for me, kids....

I'm outta here...

0 comments:

Post a Comment